I Am Much Too Tolerant of Mind Wandering!!!

As a student of A Course in Miracles since 2007, I've done the workbook lessons a few times and have studied the text randomly on my own and in group settings also.

A few weeks ago I felt inspired to self-study the text, which I find is dense and sometimes difficult to understand what its message is for me.

I have my notebook, where I take notes as I go along of what each paragraph's message means to me. I do this asking my Higher Self to guide and reveal to me what I need to learn.

So, each morning now I spend about 20-30 minutes with the Course text; it's been quite enriching. It's become clearer how important it is to be aware of my thoughts and beliefs at any given moment.  I also realize how similar most spiritual teachings are at their core.

The Course states:  "The correction of fear is your responsibility.  When you ask for release from fear, you are implying that it is not."  Chapter 2, VI.4, and it also states:  "You are much too tolerant of mind wandering, and are passively condoning your mind's miscreations."  

Oh my.  Just these two statements feel so empowering to me.  I am responsible for my mind wandering and for correction of fear.

Now, I can start to think that this is too hard, or not possible, or that I should see immediate results, But even this is a mind trick.  I keep in mind that my old beliefs are deeply rooted and willingness and practice of these new concepts and principles will bring a new experience for me. A more joyful and real one.

I am never alone in my choice of perceiving a better way.  My Higher Wisdom is always within me.  I only need to ask.

If I "Need" to Know the Outcome.....

When I "need" to know the outcome of a situation before moving forward or taking on a new endeavor or challenge, I'm not trusting my Inner Wisdom nor surrendering to Divine Guidance.

Needing to know how anything is going to turn out before I take a risk or make a decision confirms my desire to continue controlling outcomes, situations, relationships, and Life itself.

This hasn't worked out for me at all.  I've had a tendency to over-analyze and over-think everything before taking any steps, believing things have to be perfect and in place.  I have a fear of the unknown.  I want to control how things will turn out.  This has kept me stuck, resulting in losing out on wonderful challenges and hidden blessings.

I realize now that have no way of knowing or controlling how anything is going to turn out.  No confirmation or assurance.  I can only choose to trust.  Trust that all is as it needs to be and move forward.  Trust that I am taken care of!!!